Stranger than Fiction

"So I was just over here minding my business and…"

A La Zagat: Urban Fuxion Food Truck – N.O.P.E.

The Urban Fuxion food truck is located on Providence Court, Lekki Phase 1 (opposite Lanre Shittu Motors).
On weekends, I believe they move to Adeola Odeku after 11pm to service the late night revelers.

*Every Sunday at 6pm, my friends and I meet at the same bbq place with alcohol in tow, order food and lament about the week ahead. It has this authentic food truck feel and I love it.

So when we got wind of a new food truck in Lekki, we decided that we needed to give it a try. From the Instagram pictures and general hype, I was itching to try their food.*

So last night, after a four hour stint at the salon (I love my Nectar Lounge though), H and I decided to try it out.

General Ambience and Decor:

Well, it’s a pretty neat food truck. It’s clearly purpose built a la most food trucks Stateside. It has adequate allocated parking so one does not necessarily have to park on the street in front of the truck. I did anyway and H parked in the lot behind the truck. Now, Providence court houses mostly corporate organizations so it is extremely quiet and dark at night which had me looking over my shoulder a few times. The truck is also parked across from a big gutter which required unladylike maneuvering.

Rating: 6/10. Not bad but too dark and quiet. And that gutter…

Quality of Service – Menu and Ordering:

A waiter/server (?) appears and gives us some crumpled up menus. As in he literally tried to un-crumple them (he had probably been holding them for a while) and handed them over. Moments later, a waitress/server(?), lets call her Anna, saunters over and asks to take our orders with some sort of tab in her hand.
Now from our interaction with Anna…

1. Anna does not like her job.

2.Anna looked and sounded incredibly uninterested in providing the service. In fact, she came across as being almost above it.

3. Anna was borderline rude.

if you know me, I usually do not have time for such nonsense. However, yesterday I chose to ignore her as I was tired and peckish and really hoping that her attitude would not be an indication of what the food would taste like.

Both of us ordered the same thing – A strawberry Margarita, A chicken po-boy with crinkle cut fries and a sprite. (All meals come with one side and one drink). N4000 each – N1800 for the margarita and N2200 for the meal.

We did try to order Ribena (I’m off the fizzy stuff) and were told that there was an extra charge for anything other than soft drinks. Oh, and there’s also an extra charge for any side other than crinkle cut fries or fusion rice. Riiiiiight….

We waited and discussed the waitress’ attitude while she made our margaritas. We also noticed that there was someone who appeared to be the owner just hanging about inside the truck. Interestingly, and to my amusement, he could not even be bothered to say good evening. The manager did greet us though, with a smile on his face. (The manager is actually a previous employee of BBQ and Cravings. I have very few positive words to describe him based on my previous experiences with him.)

Rating: 4/10. Attitude was horrible. Plus the owner’s attitude (or lack of one) put me off. If you are going to be there, at least pretend to care about what is going on. 

Food and Drinks review (pictures below)

And so our orders came…

Look. I drink. I drink different kinds of alcohol. All kinds in fact (I’m not a fan of beer though). This strawberry margarita was the vilest thing I have ever tasted in the name of an alcoholic cocktail. As in, I got an instant headache.

It was so bad that I had to Snapchat it. I don’t Snapchat. The app has just been sitting idly on my phone.

So we began to accept that maybe this was a not so good idea.

We both took our food home and then:
image6image7image8   image9

The food (see pictures below) was just awful. Now, I know what a po-boy looks and tastes like. I am conversant with po-boys. I dare say, even fast food restaurants would do a better job. The chicken was encased in this ridiculously thick coating. All of it lacked seasoning. ALL.There was no sauce. The bread was alright but that was about it. The fries were scanty. I almost counted them but thought I shouldn’t be petty.

image4

The chicken po-boyimage2Strawberry Margarita *thumbs down*

Rating: 1/10. Only because of the bread. Everything else was a disaster.

Billing/Pricing:

For N2200, the food was beyond poor.
The margarita was maybe worth N500 but we paid N1800 each.

Rating: 5/10. Prices are a bit higher than similar establishments.It could have been worse.

Final Verdict:
I will not be going back there.I wish there was a way to say something good about Urban Fuxion. The truth is they have no business in this field. Even if the food was bad and the service was good, one would be willing to give them a pass. But noooooo, it just had to be a double whammy. Food was so bad I was upset. I started to calculate what I could have done with N4000.

OVERALL RATING: (Over 40) : 16/40. FAIL.

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4 comments on “A La Zagat: Urban Fuxion Food Truck – N.O.P.E.

  1. Oby
    August 21, 2015

    Thanks for the tip had actually wanted to try them out as someone just mentioned.

    Like

  2. H
    August 21, 2015

    Tobs, we love food and we don’t waste alcohol but mehn, I was very tempted to just chuck the whole thing in the bin. Our love, the owner of the bbq place, not only goes into the kitchen to cook, he makes the time to greet his customers, makes sure everyone is alright, cleans up and puts his back into his business. Al the fancy trappings of neat truck does not make a business. Get the food right and they will come. In their droves. As evidenced by the lack of wall space on the bbq place’s graffiti wall. I had the pleasure of visiting New Orleans and a po-boy is a staple there. I was feeling nostalgic and wanted to recreate a wonderful fun time in my life (eating jambalaya, po-boys, fried alligator, dirty rice and beignets, working my way down Bourbon Street and visiting the bars and clubs – no I didn’t flash the twins) but sadly, this fell waaaaaaay short!

    Like

  3. Tito
    August 24, 2015

    Maybe you went on a bad day. Their wings are legit and the six margarita is all shades of awesome

    Like

    • tobiloluwa
      August 24, 2015

      I appreciate your comment.
      However, I am going to have to disagree with you. I did not go on a bad day.
      I should mention that I had been there once before this but was not prepared to review so left it out of my blog post. I ordered wings and waffle fries.
      The server’s attitude was the same: nonchalant and borderline rude.

      The waffle fries were oily, soggy and salty. The wings were average at best and quite frankly were so tiny they looked like pigeon wings.

      Want to know what else? The food made me sick that night.

      This was me giving them a second chance and this time it was even worse. I will not accept the bad day excuse for a brand new establishment that had no other customers while we were there i.e. it’s not like they were swamped or anything. The food and service leaves way too much to be desired and that fancy truck is nowhere near enough to make up for it.

      Like

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This entry was posted on August 20, 2015 by in A La Zagat, Nigeria, Restaurants, Review, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , .

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