Stranger than Fiction

"So I was just over here minding my business and…"

Orobo Chronicles: Episode 2 – Like Glue

I haven’t lost any weight.

I apparently look like I have but I am heavier than when I first started this journey. And no, I have not built muscle. I want to believe that it is water weight as I am no longer exercising and I am on enough medication to cure a small family of a variety of ailments.

What happened? First, rainy season. I cannot swim or exercise outdoors in the rain because 1. It’s dangerous and 2. I have a history of ear/nose/throat AND chest issues.

Second, my skin went bonkers and so I had to stop swimming.  I got a rash on my face that turned into acne that turned into my worst nightmare. Look. I will address the whole issue in my next Tobs’ Beauty Chronicles post. The story is long.

Third, work.

Let me try to break it down. There have been quite a few new projects in the last six months that have required longer hours and taking work home. I have also had to go out of town a few times. It hasn’t been all bad as I like to be busy but my eating habits have taken a turn for the worse and I get zero exercise in (unless you want to count the myriad trips to my management’s offices).

Also, my salary appears to be stuck in a rut. I promised myself that I would keep this blog work issue free but I need to speak briefly on this. (Who knows? You may have an opportunity for me or better still, you can pray for/encourage me in some way or form)

I have been earning the same money for four years. It sucks. Mostly because I work my butt off and therefore know that I do not deserve it but also because I have been recommended for promotion at every single appraisal in the time period mentioned. So why am I still here? For sanity and well, because I still need the meagre salary (unless of course one of you has a rich uncle who is willing to make my fantasy of being a lady of leisure a reality. I kid, I kid….*ahem*)

Eating healthy and working out in Lagos are NOT cheap. Especially when the rainy season is doing what it likes. For instance, a salad costs twice as much as a burger. Why can’t you make your food yourself, you say? Well, there’s this thing with the power supply and its many frustrating issues that I am not willing to go into. At least, not in this post. And of course, work. ( see last three paragraphs)

Fourth and final, my stomach issues.

I mentioned earlier that I am on medication for a variety of things. Now, in these very frightening times (Ebola ooo!!!), one stays away from hospitals, unless they absolutely need to be there. Last week, I absolutely needed to be there.

After a few days of lamenting about my weight and feeling bad, I decided to eat healthy. Day 1 went okay. I had some oats and a cup of coffee in the morning, amala and okro in the afternoon, a pure juice smoothie from So Fresh Market on Awolowo Road at like 4pm, and protein for dinner. Day 2. Egg sandwich on wheat bread from Oleander Bakehouse and coffee for breakfast, pure juice smoothie  at like 1pm, and then because it was a really busy day, I didn’t have a “proper’ lunch.

Now, I am on medication that lowers blood sugar ( no, I am not diabetic. It treats something else. Another long story.) and I have to take this with meals or it will mess me up. That day, I took it right after my smoothie with some other supplements.

At 6pm, I started to feel nauseous. I figured it was because I had had too much fluid and not enough food. I had also upped my daily water intake. I went for my weekly Friday meeting and just prayed it would be short. At 6:20, I was so nauseous I had to excuse myself. I walked straight to the bathroom and began to throw up. My stomach was empty so at first it was lots of water then it became  painful retching. I managed to control this and went back to the meeting. Thankfully, it was ending so I just picked up my things and headed to my office.

On getting to my floor, I felt the urge to be sick again. I walked into the bathroom and someone was in the only functioning stall so I headed back to my office. I pulled out my food bowl and went to town. At this point, I was in debilitating pain and was still retching with breaks of bile spotted with blood. I guess this is the part where I mention that I have a peptic ulcer. Yeah. Not fun.

After a bit, I downed some Gaviscon and water. Everything came back up. I was in so much pain that I thought of laying on the floor for relief . THIS, dear friends, is proof of how much pain I was in.

Eventually (after calling the hospital down the road from my office and being told that an ambulance would cost me N15,000), I called my parents. The pain had rendered me immobile so I couldn’t even see a future where I would walk to my car and drive to the hospital. They arrived in 10 minutes and bundled me off to the hospital where I was ushered straight to the doctor and was given ulcer medicine intravenously. Two hours later, I was home cooking rice and gravy (because no-one else would and I’m tougher than I like to accept most times).

My doctor warned me to park the “healthy” eating for now. She reminded me to stay away from caffeine, most oily and/or spicy foods and fibre (for now). This rules out almost every Nigerian staple food and then some. I can’t have fruit or salad BUT I can have some cooked veggies.  I am NOT giving up fried plantain for anything though. I can not. That’s all.


So what CAN I do for now? I bought a waist trainer from and I am using it religiously. I also have reduced portion sizes, left coffee alone, started counting calories and stick to meal times.

PLUS, I will do my squats, lunges, bicep curls, crunches and planks in my room. Yup.

Hopefully, it all works out somehow. I AM trying and God sees my heart.



One comment on “Orobo Chronicles: Episode 2 – Like Glue

  1. Bar Baric (@Bar_Baric)
    August 27, 2014

    For me, one of the stumbling blocks to keeping fit is work. There’s just too much work to do for me to have time for anything else. I thought hiring my first staff would ease things off, but the fear of not having her salary at month’s end just made me work even more.

    I’ll have time someday…I’ll workout someday.


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This entry was posted on August 22, 2014 by in Nigeria, Orobo Chronicles, Personal and tagged , , , , , , , .


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